Who To Blame for Infidelity?
Are you currently in a situation where your husband or long term significant other has possibly ventured slightly outside of the conventional borders of a monogamous relationship and perhaps entered into territory which may not be so acceptable to you in terms of your preferable comfort zone in your concept of a relationship? Are you possibly searching for a quick and easy answer to why such a situation may have occurred or perhaps looking for is a quick and easy way to cast some blame in the scenario so you can easily justify blaming your partner for the situation entirely? Are you possibly even looking for a way to justify an opportunity for a personally habitual tendency toward blaming yourself entirely as a part of a pattern of guilt and depression or some other habitual tendency? The truth is likely far less quick and easy in just about any long term relationship and regardless of what people may generally prefer to do by casting blame on one party or another, the simple fact is that no one is really to blame when it ultimately comes down to it.
There is obviously the possibility of legal implications during divorce proceedings if one party in a marriage is involved in an extramarital relationship, but the party to “blame” is a much more in depth psychological tango than any court today is really equipped to appropriately examine. Regardless of the face or façade that the “innocent” party may present and convince their friends and family and possibly even a court of, the truth remains and the “innocent” party will always know what part they may have actually played in possibly motivationally inducing their partner to the eventual point of exploring options beyond their relationship. Non-doing is possibly just as much of an issue as doing when it comes to relationships and one person’s excessive inactivity is a factor which likely should be considered equal to another person’s potentially excessive activity. Standing idly by is sadly, in a court, not an activity which is taken into account and yet is an obviously reasonable motivation in an open discussion with a friend. If, for instance, you told a friend that you would really appreciate a hug because your husband refuses to hug you and that kind of contact is important to your psychological well being, then your friend would more than likely be sympathetic and truly understanding and most likely give you a hug without a thought.
Human relationships are something that is far beyond the often black and white programming fed to society through media like movies and organized governmental bodies which are created by wealthy people to easily manipulate and control the masses. The simple fact that the standards across the world are so widely varying is an impervious testament to the ridiculousness of thinking in black and white terms. If one looks at the black and white of societies across the world throughout history, it all becomes completely absurd. What is normal and acceptable in one country is possibly considered inappropriate and unacceptable in another. Humans are humans, regardless of location, and relationships are as varied as people are!
It is time to stop blaming and start moving forward to resolve the situation.