Catch Spouse Cheating

Rarely will you meet a person who is fine with being second best; or second anything.  Striving to be the best is usually at the top of everybody’s list when setting out to do something.  This desire to be number one is most coveted when it comes to being in a relationship.  We all want to be the main squeeze in our partner’s life.  The fact is we want to be the only squeeze in their life.  This is one situation where we have permission to be selfish and not share what we have with anybody else.  Still somehow, at some time in our life, we will be presented with the decision to take a back seat to somebody else in our romantic life.  For most people, this is not an option.  At least, it is not an option when we are thinking clearly and our judgment is not clouded by emotions that trump our rational way of thinking.

Becoming the other woman usually happens in a way that seems to soften the blow, and gives you just enough room to rationalize the situation to the point of deceiving yourself about what’s really happening.  By the time you are painfully aware of your new role, you are so deep in the situation that to go back would mean facing the ugly facts of the truth.  It seems so much easier on your ego to continue to go forward holding on to your expectations of the outcome you promised yourself.  But no matter what you told yourself, to allow this to happen, the reality of the situation is not pretty and very painful.  It has you questioning your sanity, judgment, and intelligence.

Being the other woman in a relationship means that we are the person who was last to come into the relationship and who needs to be kept a secret.  The need for us to be kept secret comes from our partners desire to keep the primary woman happy and invested in the relationship.  This fact alone is demeaning and insulting, but the spin that our partner puts on it will surely paint a completely different picture.  Unfortunately, we are very much aware of our partner’s ability to paint pretty pictures over, the less than desirable parts, of his character and moral fiber.

If you were lured into the role of second best by lies, only to be told the truth after you were emotionally attached to him, this should be all the validation you need to be able to walk away from the situation with no feelings of responsibility or guilt attached.  But if you knew his status before you let yourself become emotionally and physically involved with him, it may be a little more difficult to walk away.  In this situation you made the decision to jump in with your eyes open, all the while convincing yourself that this was how it had to be for now, but it would only be temporary; but you didn’t take into consideration that something can be temporary for a long time.  A respectable man would not expect any woman to take on his situation, temporary or not, if it would cause her pain.

However it was that you found yourself in this unsavory situation, once you realize that this is not what you want for yourself, every single day should be spent backing yourself out of it.